don't fear the sun.

When did I last post? goes to check More than a week ago, okay. Things have happened.

I had the birthday for my friend coming up Saturday and survived. I won't say triumphed, because anything you're so stressed for that you're actually physically sick for more than a day after doesn't feel like a triumph, but I was at the party with people I don't know, I didn't die and my friend had a good time. That's the important thing. Also, her idea of making it a craft/DIY event was really good! The shared third element of everyone working on their own thing, able to chat about that, really helped. I made a Lady of the Camellias themed collage that I might show off later, since I'm very satisfied with it!



Just in general, January has been tough, and pretty much everything I had planned to do has failed to be done. I wanted to reread my Napoli fanfic, but have been stalling on it in favour of running beta corrections on Lest They Leave, my 1920's novel, instead. I have a beta job waiting to be done, myself, for a friend online and only a week left to do it, so I really need to get myself together. However, everything has kinda grinded to a halt. Twice has my social worker visits gotten cancelled due to snow over the past three weeks. I feel out of the loop with everything, and have literally no motivation or energy to do anything about it.

The only thing I have managed to do is finishing Our Flag Means Death, which I loved, especially season 2, and have started roleplaying from in the DWRP community here on the site along with my girlfriend. It's just really nice playing a mature, functional relationship (yes, we play Ed and Stede), compared to basically all the other shit modern media throws our way. It's the most fun I've had roleplaying in ages, and I'm just really clinging to it these days when nothing else seems to work.



Besides, I've been in a Lady of the Camellias mode the past couple of days, if my icon switch-around (lots of Kizzy Matiakis in my line-up now) isn't evidence enough. I really want to reread the book, at least in part and especially, I'm gathering my wits to rewatch the Paris Opera Ballet 2008 staging which is up in full on YouTube. Very good quality, too. I have it on DVD as well, but watching it online is easier. I don't know what it is about this story that makes me return to it, I've returned to it habitually the past ten years and it never tires me or bores me, especially not in the ballet version which is amazing.

I was gonna say that it's Marguerite as a character and while I love the lady, I have recently taken a shine to Armand as well, especially when danced well by great danseurs like Alexander Bozinoff, Andreas Kaas or Stéphane Bullion. I personally think Armand is a more interesting character in the ballet than in the book, his slightly different framework really helps define him in Neumeier's choreography, but even in the book he has moment where I think, even while finding him an idiot, I can sympathize with him greatly. We're all mistake-makers. His mistake just costs him more greatly than most of us have to pay up.



So, we'll see what I get or don't get done today. If I finally sit down and do my canon-review of the ballet or not. I've been up most of the night, so I'll also need a nap at some point before noon.

Sleep, at least during the day, I can do.

It's snowing in Denmark currently. Like, more snow than we've had for years. People are legitimately snowed in some parts of the country. We're not quite at that in my region, but local police has still warned against all unnecessary travel, whether in car or by foot. So, K. and I have stayed inside, finishing some RP'ing we've been working on the past couple of days. Secured dinner from the fridge. Drunk a lot of tea and coffee. Tealights are lit everywhere in our living room. It's warm inside, luckily.



I'm listening to Ayumi Hamasaki (her Duty album, will go change to her Guilty album in a little while, that one is my favourite) while doing research for a character that popped into my head a couple of days ago and who I want to write something for now, hopefully before the week is over. She is actually a side character to one of my Revue girls, but I ended up loving her so much, she's getting her own show, hahaha.

Watanabe Yuriko, she's a ballerina (always tie in ballet wherever I can, I know), originally from Osaka, and dating one of the Revue actresses, Izumi. She's an unapologetic and severe character who knows what she wants and goes for it 100 percent. I'll be centering her story around the staging of Caravaggio (which I also 100 percent recommend you watch, it's a piece of art) by her Japanese ballet company, where she gets a leading role, something that fuels her hopes and aspirations for a promotion, hopes that will eventually be disappointed, prompting her to look for work elsewhere... Yes, leaving behind her girlfriend.

It's a story about the effort put into achieving your dreams, how you won't always succeed, but can't give up because of that. I think it'll be fun to write.



However, it had me look up Caravaggio again. I have the DVD, bought it ages ago (I think it's from 2009-ish but don't quote me on that), and have watched it a couple of times since. It's one of those performances that get stuck in your mind, so you actually don't need a million rewatches, because all the main elements are just there, like crystal memories. However, when you do rewatch it, it takes your breath away every single time.

That kind of ballet.

My favourite part is the one called "The Dance of the Young Musicians" which is a kind of pas de deux/pas de trois, where the main components of the choreography are danced by Shoko Nakamura and, I think, Michael Banzhaf, but because Vladimir Malakhov dances the role of Caravaggio and is part of the setting, he assists in some bits. It's amazingly beautiful and probably the best bit of the whole performance, though what originally made me buy it was the very last section which I caught on TV, featuring Malakhov and Leonard Jakovina in the most intensely intimate pas de deux I've ever seen, regardless of gender. Not in a sexual way, just very very beautiful.

Not a lot of Caravaggio can be seen on YouTube, but the Young Musicians section is actually uploaded, so I'm going to share it here, in the hopes someeone needed this beauty today and could find it with me.

Watch on YouTube

Thinking about jumping into the game over at rainbowfic again with this writing for Yuriko. Need to pick out a few colors for her, in that case. Purple hue? Purple hue.

Went to bed some unspecified time between half past eight and nine last night which, unsurprisingly, resulted in waking up in the middle of the night. I rarely sleep more than four hours at a time. Honestly, I should go catch a couple of hours more, but I'm feeling like doing this entry first.

Maybe after hitting post, I'll give myself over to sleep.



So, I rewatched (in bits and pieces) some old Zuka shows yesterday and I have (mostly random and rambling) thoughts about what I saw. The shows I binged were Shall We Dance (Yukigumi, 2013-14), Dark Brown Eyes (Yukigumi, 2011), Milan Wrapped in a Fog (Yukigumi, 2005) - yes, Yukigumi is a trend, I own very few shows that don't star that troupe - and I have to say, they are extremely different. Both Milan and Shall We Dance are Grand Theatre shows with all the extravaganza that comes of that, where Dark Brown Eyes is a touring show. Even so, I think Dark Brown Eyes was overall the best watching experience. It stars Otozuki Kei and Maihane Mimi in the leads, and they both get to do a lot of what they do best, Kimu got to sing and Mimi got to dance (and what dance!) and the whole aesthetic was really good. Some really good sequences and songs. I need to watch it all in one go at some point.

Shall We Dance is a modern show, lots of use of visual effects and tech, but unfortunately it's still just not a good show. Saving graces are Kazuho So in the lead with Manaka Ayu as her character's wife (best musumeyaku solo ever!), but Sagira Seina was miscast in a musumeyaku lead role and Mizusu Aki was injured halfway through the run, so the DVD is from when her substitute took over her role which is just not as good... I love the original story for nostalgic reasons and I think this 'update' is really funny and in some places moving, but mostly it's just too silly without the charm of the original. For an ensemble show, though, there were strong actresses in there.

Last but not least, Milan. It's one of those BIG Grand Theatre productions that I feel I should love, but didn't. Maybe because I think Komu looked bored in the lead, Maachan's role was pretty but not really that significant and the most likeable character was the villain, played by my fave Takashiro Kei. It had the scope and air of an original Elisabeth prouduction, but didn't quite rise to that level. It was definitely an attempt at giving Yukigumi at the time something similar to it. Costumes were on point, though. OMG.

I still have a few shows to rewatch, in particular two non-Yukigumi shows, In the Amber-Hued Rain (Hanagumi, 2003) and Spring Snow (Tsukigumi, 2012), both favourites of mine. Maybe I'll do that tomorrow. Later today. Whatever you call it.



I should also dig through my old photobooks. I know I have both Takashiro Kei's and Takumi Hibiki's, two of my favourite otokoyaku, stored away somewhere. Maybe I'll also go on the hunt for those soon.