wednesday.

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I saw my social worker this morning and we scheduled an extra appointment before New Year, mostly to find time to catch up and evaluate after X-mas. I got new appointments scheduled all the way into March and then, made some plans for the holidays, so I know what arrangements we have and when I have free time and what possibly to do with that free time. I'm planning on reading, writing and roleplaying my way through the holidays this year. Generally just distract myself as much as I can.

I'm not tired as such, I actually slept rather well last night, but I feel drained and exhausted. Like everything's a little bit bothersome and difficult. It's a mental state, not a physical one.

I'm working on a piece of Danish writing. I haven't written anything substantial in Danish in years and it still feels a little bit like working in a foreign tongue, although it's my mother tongue, but the process of getting words down on paper (or on screen) is very... it requires focus and activates parts of my brain that writing in English doesn't quite seem to, so I really like it. It feels puzzle-like. Stringing things together in a non-metaphorical sense. Literally, like crocheting and making every thread form a larger picture, that feeling. I love it. But it also exhausts me, so I can't write a lot at a time.

So, I just sat and read over what I've written so far (only 1360 words) and I'm actually really pleased with it. It's a semi-autobiographical piece, about a girl's development into an adult and how her relationships to various women in her life are shaped by her first love, Lykke (girl's name that means "happiness" in English). I am planning for it to be five vignette-type chapters, one for each significant woman in her life, starting with Lykke and ending with her long-term partner, Liv (girl's name that means "life" in English) - I think I've talked about it in here before... Still working on the first chapter. Normally, the reason I don't write long novels and such is because I have to stay in the same mode for a fic all the way through the end and that can get really exhausting if it's a long one. However, this one seems pretty easy for me to step into and back from and that feels like a huge relief. Like, it doesn't bind me?

That's probably weird. It's my own writing, damn it.

It's K's last day at work today before X-mas. So from tonight and until next Tuesday, she's off work. It's a short holiday this year, compared to how it's often from X-mas to New Year that she's off. Me? I have no plans. I'll probably spend a couple of weeks after New Year on just rewinding and finding my feet after the holidays, family time, that sort of thing.

Hopefully, I'll get some writing done. Of some kind.

wednesday.

After having sat down with the 50+ pairings I want to write about for Fannish Fifty, I've finally organized the first 2 months of next year, so each week gets a pairing. We're starting with the Bournonville ballets, since those are the ones I'm most familiar with myself, being a Danish balletomane and all... So the first month will be dedicated to La Sylphide's various constellations, after that A Folk's Tale and finally, Napoli will divide February between themselves evenly. I'm very excited about this, as it's the perfect excuse for a rewatch of all three ballets.

Not that I need an excuse, but I do enjoy watching things more when I have a purpose with doing so.

Haven't arranged the rest of the ballets yet, thought I'd try taking it a month or two at a time, in case something changes re: my interest and such. I'm changeable like that.

Anyway, suddenly next year feels much more like an actual reality. It's only little more than a week away.

Also, new layout. In honour of...