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Entry tags:
monday.
EPIGRAM by Nicarchus
The screech-owl sings; death follows at her cries:
Demophilus strikes up; the screech-owl dies.
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On the endless list of movies I should definitely see but probably never will: Agora.
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THE BATTLE (GLADIATOR) - HANS ZIMMER
Currently obsessed with this track from the Gladiator soundtrack and I can listen to it on repeat while I play the sleaziest power dom/predator man from an Ancient Rome/Greece-inspired fantasy setting I've ever played. It just fits the mood so well.
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I've been quiet since Thursday, because I went to my internship thingy and it went like shit. I completely triggered on something that happened and because the boss lady didn't know me at all yet, we kind of didn't manage to communicate about it. Me, because I dissociated and her, because she couldn't know, so that was crap. I went home and was very upset and triggered and nervous about the entire situation almost the entire weekend - and then, nervous about having to talk to my mentor about the situation today, going through my experience and my reactions and all the things that are f*cking hard to address on any regular day and then after four shit days? ... But I did it, we talked it over and decided to pause my internship until we have an opportunity to talk with my social worker about how to proceed from here. More waiting. More unknown factors. More unknown future and more having to reorganise the plans I had in my head for this. I'm a literal mess today and just getting through on RP and tea, basically.
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In better news, K. and I took a break from our functional love muffins to play something a bit darker and grittier. I have a character from the same universe, Timachus' lover/guardian/master, Sarica, who I've been wanting to take for a spin since I finished writing an epic, dark, uncomfortable fic for him, which you may find here, mind the grooming and power imbalance warnings, they're for real.
K. has wanted to play Anakin Skywalker from the Clone Wars series for a while and since Efith could easily be a planet/world from the Star Wars universe, we decided to do some cross-canon and that usually works well for us. Did here as well, tbh. It's just very dark and predatory and grooming-like and I'm loving getting to play that, it happens so rarely.
So now I've developed a serious Sarica muse and am hoping to get to write more fic for him along the line, have one already planned, one lined up and two on the backburner. There'll be time.